Laurel, Hardy and Top Fuel

I don't know if David Hobbs would be elequent in an NHRA Drag Racing Booth, filling in for Tony Pedregon or Brian Lohnes, but, the things you don't want to see is a Laurel and Hardy Effort in Top Fuel, because those are the most serious cars with the most serious people.

I would love to just mindlessly Drag Race everyone's Head Faculty for War and for Fun. I would get a big kick out of that, even though I'd be closer to Alex Laughlin and his Gas Monkeys and Tony Stark than that of WJ, Jim Yates, and Tim Wilkerson, because of my emotional charge.

I would like to see Tony Schumacher retake the Top Fuel Start Column because even though Doug Kalitta is National Champion, but, I want the Top Fuel mark be rehelmed by a World Champion.

I couldn't hack Actors, Jobbers and Swear Words from Centerville. The Play Teacher Worship has to be dangerous and if we really banned the box, we'd hire all those hacks and then some to replace dignified, honest, hardworking Hall of Famers.

I hate to just spiel off about Unions like it is new, but, sadly, they've made work expensive and the other Pro Union-Anti Union War is scoundrels, scumbags and other scalawags wanting Shopping Money. The least I could ask is Instagrammers hawkishly hawking their wheres in Des Moines Roosevelt's Barn like it was a Flea Market.

I doubt the Head Teacher would indignantly take being beached by Stevie Fast or Steve Torrence, or heaven forbid, Spencer Massey, Tanner Gray or a Street Outlaw like they couldn't figure parts to save her life and career.

Would a Top Fuel 32 be accepted?

I, as a Drag Racing Fan would have problems selling a Top Fuel 64 the same as a Funny Car 64. I would have to think something along the lines of Nitro vs. Top Alcohol Dragster for series bragging rights. Would we get the Spencer Massey vs. Antron Brown rematch?

I am loosely inspired by the Top Fuel #900 Race, and Steve Torrence would have as many wins as Joe Amato passed "Big Daddy" Don Garlits in the 1996 World Finals. I would like to see Tony Schumacher tie and pass Bob Glidden for Win #85 and then, set the bar up for Win #100.

I don't know if we'd get Winner #110 to tie 108,109 but 110 and 111 would be better than 112 or heaven forbid, 1-teen. I doubt a lot of us have the sensabilities of Jane Austen's "Emma", but, I feel our sensabilities are well known at something we don't like or don't like to history.

32 Top Fuelers would not be Sports Entertainment the same as Funny Cars nor I could find 32 Pro Stock Cars without having to go Car vs. Motorcycle. I would not want to see lags or beaches in anyone, which there is not always people in the stands for the Part Timers, but, I wouldn't want to chin a chance at victory or make 17th indifferent to not being in the show.